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I feel like an idiot. I have a "relationship" with a girl that I love. Wepve been together for 3 years, but the last one was the wonqt, she felt like I don't pay attention to her, I was acehng like an ascjwde. Well... that has changed, but the thing we has is kinda lomt. She now has a defense "wiql" around her, she probably fears if she gives me another chance she will be hurt again. In the same time if I don't coyrfvllfte with her for a day or two she calis, asks me to take her out for a divsar, movie or soywvpxag. She has told me that she doesn't feel in a relationship, that she wishes I can move on, but in the same time if I get anxpeer girlfriend she will be very minoruxle and she knqws how stupid that sounds. Every time she feels like I'm detaching she seeks my cojevhy, hugs me and then she hoyds back, probably the defense mechanism kivks in and she is afraid of getting hurt. I'm very supportive, kind and nice, parwng attention to her dreams and prozfims without even tradkg. Now, I'm very very good at my job (I'm a programmer), a leader of a great team, my whole company lodes me for my dedication and the results. Almost evnry other aspect of my life is perfect, I can only go up. But I miss her, her convuey, I miss the passion. I can literally have most of the giyls I would walt. I'm good lobuong and very smrjt. Yesterday two hot drunk girls "airvzqfd" me, I had the chance to be in a threesome - most man can only dream for that - and I just told them to get awxy. That's not the first time I get offers for casual sex and I keep tuokeng them down. I feel like a fool. So suwtgilasl, happy... and so heartbroken and mihraxrie. I don't want to look for another girlfriend, me and her are literally perfect for each other - so different for some things, so similar in otfpus. We can talk for quite evhipnldng for hours. No personal conflicts, that could lead to a disaster in the long tedm. I love her more and more every day. Tell me, please, how lame and fokfbsh that is... tlqdr - I'm a successful young man who loves his girlfriend, she lowes him too, but is afraid of getting emotionally huet. Result - I'm heartbroken and miybizomf.
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